{wild flower}

I DREAMED THAT EDEN LIVED INSIDE ME

2012-02-19T05:41:00.000-08:00

For this shoot, I had to stay away from my safe zone that is places filled with tall grasses and trees. I had to control myself to not go there or at least minimize going to such places. I was successful somehow.

THIS IS THE SOUND OF SETTLING

2012-01-28T22:47:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, you could easily find love in the company of your friends while inside an incredibly crowded and noisy fast food restaurant like McDonald's. Sharing an order of large fries, a Hot fudge and Caramel Sundae duo and playing Monopoly Deal until you feel that it's time for all of you to go home.

SCENTED WITH NICOTINE, PERFUME AND NICOTINE

2012-01-19T07:50:00.000-08:00

Do you know how badly I want a cigarette right now?
But no. I manfully suffer through nicotine withdrawal—all for you.

I don't think I have directly mentioned that I smoke (or should I say smoked? Err, I don't know). Well, never did I deny the fact that I am actually smoking though, it just so happen that nobody asked me or relatively few people had asked me before and most of the people who had seen my answer didn't really care. Anyway, I am proud to say that I am now in the process of quitting one of my deadly vices which is smoking and I think I am kind of successful with it. I haven't had a stick since this weekend and hopefully it continues until the end of time.

So maybe you're wondering what made me quit?

Aside from the fact that I've finally come to the realization that it's not good for my health (like how TV commercials and that sticker pasted on the cigarette pack itself would often remind cigarette buyers but to no avail), the HARSH REALITY that people REALLY, REALLY die of smoking too much slapped me hard in the face a couple of days ago.

AND I'M SORRY EVERYDAY

2012-01-13T07:58:00.000-08:00

Listening to sad songs (one was 23 by Jimmy Eat World) while waiting for sleep to beckon me. I'm having a hard time sleeping since vacation and I honestly do not have the slightest idea why. Because of that, I'm currently having difficulty following my daily class schedule as I usually end up late for my first classes and that is even if my first class usually starts at 11:30 am.

God, I need to fix my terribly messed up body clock as soon as possible. I can't afford to miss random chances and various opportunities simply because I ended up sleeping my precious time away.

HELLO 2012!

2012-01-05T03:13:00.000-08:00

I am relaunching this blog for the year 2012. Expect more photographs not to mention, more personal entries in the coming days, weeks and hopefully months. Let this be also my way of saying that I am officially abandoning my livejournal account for blogspot (not that this is relevant to anyone except myself).

I know that only a few people read this blog as compared to my tumblr account but nevertheless, I'd like to thank each and everyone of you for reading my entries and dropping comments every now and then. It's good to know that people do not just read your entries but at some point, a part of them sympathizes with you.

Happy New Year everyone.

Cheers! <3

P.S. In case you haven't noticed, I have a relatively new blogger layout.

HOW DID IT GET SO LATE SO SOON?

2011-11-08T05:08:00.000-08:00

I had an eventful day today. For the first time in my life, I took that opportunity to meet fellow bloggers for a particular project. I solemnly swear not to divulge more information regarding the project so as to not spoil it but definitely, it is something I and the bloggers I had a meeting with this afternoon look forward to. I'm pretty sure you guys will love it too but then, you have to wait a little while for everything to materialize. Rest assured, we are already working on this project.

Thank you for your time today Chelsea, Anj, Teesh and of course, Mika! You guys are just made of awesome. I really, really look forward to this project of ours. Let's do this!

SOMETHING TO PONDER ABOUT

2011-11-07T04:04:00.000-08:00

"beauty does not come without suffering”; lit. “you have to suffer to be pretty"

Sometimes I couldn’t help but think that this phrase is relatively true nowadays. I myself am guilty of this. I actually have to deprive myself of some things to achieve my own definition of being beautiful and honestly, I think most if not all of us are guilty of committing the same thing be it consciously or unconsciously. We do not eat this and that because it’ll make us fat, we stay away from the sun because we like to have that almost white complexion or we stay outside too much because we like to have that beautiful beach tan. Sometimes, when people have that supple financial amount, they even opt to undergo various surgical treatments to achieve their standard of beauty.

But at the end of the day, we ought to realize that beauty is still in the eye of the beholder and we do not need the media, the society and/or anything else for us to be able say that we truly are beautiful. The definition of beauty is a social construct, we should not let it control our way of living and ourselves.

HELP IS ON THE WAY

2011-11-06T02:42:00.000-08:00

I love spontaneous trips. It makes me feel alive more than anything. I like the idea of not planning anything and just allowing your feet coupled with your often trusty instincts to take you to wherever it wants to take you. Besides, planned trips do not push through as planned most of the time so, it is safe to say that spontaneous trips are less disappointing.

Unfortunately, there are days when such trips are not possible for hundreds, thousands of reasons and lately, it is as if those days are becoming greater and greater.

BE CLOSE, BE WHERE I AM

2011-11-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

Perhaps, you should try listening to The Still's, I'm With You and The Mostar Diving Club's, Worlds Apart while browsing this set of photographs. It might give you a different mood you see.

I could honestly tell you that I am not the happiest person in this entire planet at the moment. Sure I have moments of happiness courtesy of the people around me specifically my boyfriend and closest friends, but then, I find most of those very, very fleeting lately. I don't know if it is because something is terribly wrong with me or life would just like to make fun of me thus, giving me a boring bordering miserable life while on sembreak. I'd like to believe the latter though. That life would simply like to fuck me real hard.

But that doesn't make me stop from doing anything, from practically living and breathing. Besides, next week's my birthday (week), I don't like to mess it up.

LIVE LIKE IT'S HEAVEN ON EARTH

2011-10-18T23:26:00.000-07:00

I've attempted to revive this blog and turn this into something as productive as my tumblr, livejournal and flickr but I almost always fail to do so. This another space of mine on the internet has become rather dormant compared to the web pages I just mentioned and it's somehow disappointing because as I was browsing some blogspot accounts awhile ago (primarily photography blogs), I figured that people here are talented and interesting and I'd really like to get to know some of you. A handful of pages I browsed awhile ago inspired me to become better in photography though with a tint of envy because the photos I've been seeing are nothing short of being beautiful and wonderful all at the same time. How that became possible, well it's probably because of the photographer himself.

I'll update here more frequently from now on. Somehow, I feel alienated because people here are oozing with so much talent while I'm still trapped in the middle of not having one and having one.

However, I'd like to believe that I'm getting there. I will, soon.